Excerpt One

During and after your friend’s wedding, I thought a lot about if I can spend the rest of my life with you. 

There’s some things you feel,

Some things you don’t.

Some things made up.

Others ignored.

Then there's the things that keep floating to the surface.

Bubbling right on up.

After we returned to Nashville, I had a panic attack that caused my body to go weak, and I fell to the floor. I couldn’t breathe. 

I knew I couldn’t spend the rest of my life with you. 

I told you it was fatigue and stress.

Excerpt Two

Tell me Janeen -

Am I broken? Can I repair it?

What happened to me?

I look to you for answers - Forgetting that I can find them.

Tell me Janeen - Does disease escape anyone? Do lies ever help? Is it possible to love me before someone else?

I’m on this journey - A pursuit of rebuilding what I didn't know had failed.

I’m unlearning and unlearning and unlearning.

I’m tight in my chest and can't always see. Things are different while seeming all the same.

It’s like I’m waking up with amnesia, but still, I can’t un-see what I now see.

So, tell me Janeen -

Am I broken? Can I repair it?

What the hell happened to me?